Statistical Weirdness

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By Mike Johnson

Some events exude a weird magnetism that tilts statistical probability.

If you drop a slice of peanut butter toast, there is a 100% chance that it lands spread-side down.

When you plug in a USB cable, despite there only being two possible options, it always takes three tries.

If a car stops on the shoulder of a deserted road, two other vehicles will suddenly appear from opposite directions and pass at the exact point where that first car sits.


Itís like the source code of our reality is sprinkled with monkeyshines designed by a practical joker.

This makes perfect sense because God has to have a sense of humor.
I mean, look around.
This place is hilarious.

When you encounter a plump person in spandex pants, with a facial tattoo, nose ring and pink hair, reading a cell phone, while struggling to load a 24-pack of toilet paper into their Costco cart, you just have to grin.
This exotic visual doesnít just happen by accident.

Especially when, on the other side of the aisle, someone with blue hair, wearing pajamas, holding a Yorkshire Terrier, is loading paper towels.
Thereís nobody else in the entire 100-foot long aisle, but these two have totally blocked passage for you.

These little moments of silliness and statistical improbability just might be Godís way of reminding us to lighten up.

I choose to think so.


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